I honor of the wackiest headline of 2005: Schwarzenegger hires former Gray Davis aide Susan Kennedy as chief of staff (CAPITOL WEEKLY). I have compiled the following wacky headlines you are just as likely to see before the end of the year.
NEW MAJORITY'S HIGBY HOSPITALIZED AFTER ACCIDENT WITH COMB
NEW BOOK: HOW TO PROTECT YOUR PENSION BY KEN LAY FORWARD BY JIM SILVA AND BILL CAMPBELL
CONGRESSMAN CUNNINGHAM SAYS IT WAS ALL FAKE, HE WAS PUNK'D BY KUTCHER
SPITZER URGES GOV. TO COMMUTE TOOKIE WILLIAMS SENTENCE TO LIFE IN PRISON
NEW BOOK: STANDING TALL BY TOM TUCKER
RECENTLY DIVORCED ACKERMAN AND TRAN ANNOUNCE THEY ARE TO WED IN CANADA
GARY HUNT LEADS HUMILITY CLASSED FOR NEW MAJORITY MEMBERS
IRVINE'S AGRAN SUPPORTS DRILLING IN ANWR
NEW BOOK: HOW TO MAINTAIN 245 ON THE KRISPY KREME DIET BY DAVE GILLIARD
OC SUPERVISOR CAMPBELL RUNS MARATHON, SAY TRIATHLON NEXT
SANCHEZ TO RUN FOR GOVERNOR (oh wait that one was real)
MY VACATION WITH TOM FUENTES BY R. SCOTT MOXLEY
NEW BOOK: HOW TO STAY FAITHFUL TO YOUR WIFE CO-AUTHORED BY GEORGE JARAMILLO AND TOM UMBERG
FORMER U. S. SENATOR ALAN CRANSTON APPOINTED POSTHUMOUSLY BY GOV. AS SECRETARY OF HEALTH SERVICES
NEW DNA STUDY FINDS DORNAN DOES IN FACT HAVE THE CRAZY GENE
GILCHRIST ADMITS AFFAIR WITH ILLEGAL ALIEN MEXICAN HOUSEBOY
BAUGH EATS SALAD, SAYS I'M FULL
Ok, now it is your turn, take my lead and post your favorite fake headlines of 2005 or email me at roscoeblogger@hotmail.com and I will post the the best ones giving you credit or I can keep you anonymous if you'd like.
BREAKING NEWS: JAN 8, 06, PROBOLSKY EDGES OUT DUMITRU, MURPHY, BAUGH, WINS OC MARATHON
Posted by: Goofing | November 30, 2005 at 05:08 AM
OC EMPLOYEES RENOUNCE PENSIONS, DEMAND CUT!
"Thanks, but no thanks" to Supes; "Just too darn much"
Posted by: anon ii | November 30, 2005 at 08:37 AM
anon ii, would that wildly implausible headline also apply to the Sheriff Deputies?
Posted by: redperegrine | November 30, 2005 at 08:59 AM
"Loretta Sanchez Joins The Minutemen...Supports Interior Enforcement"
"US Deeds Santa Ana To Mexico"
"Larry Agran Becomes An Ethics Professor At UCI"
"Cassie DeYoung Decrys NIMBYISM"
"Darrell Issa Tries To Kick Arnold Out OF The GOP Party"...oh wait, that could actually happen
"In a Stunning Turnabout...Mike Corona Remain Faithfull To His Wife"
"Hugh Hewitt Shows A Hint of Political Independence"
Those are just a few that I can think of that will never happen.
Powder Blue Report
Posted by: Allan Bartlett | November 30, 2005 at 09:34 AM
Red- Of course! Do you think I could have lasted in this job for almost three decades without a sense of humor?
And just for Allan-
"South OC Discovers Downtown Santa Ana is the Real Happiest Place on Earth"
Posted by: anon ii | November 30, 2005 at 09:53 AM
LOL anonymous!
Powder Blue Report
Posted by: Allan Bartlett | November 30, 2005 at 09:59 AM
"Bea Tiritilli pulls off massive upset, new Congresswoman for California's 48th District"
Posted by: JozefColomy | November 30, 2005 at 10:09 AM
"Ahnold's Pardon Pays Off- Tookie to Start US Tour with Laura Bush- "No MF Left Behind""
OK, that's enough- have to go slop at the county trough in a while...
Posted by: anon ii | November 30, 2005 at 11:12 AM
POLICE CALLED TO BREAK UP WILD PARTY AT DANNEMEYER RESIDENCE
Nick
Posted by: NickM | November 30, 2005 at 11:34 AM
Moreno and Pringle Settle Name Dispute for Orange County Angels
Annual Permit Holiday Spurs NIMBYS to Build on Their Own Back Yards
Loretta Sanchez New Governor Appoints Patricia Clarey Chief of Staff
Posted by: mxsmokewood | November 30, 2005 at 12:15 PM
"USC Beats UCLA December 3rd" :P
Posted by: JozefColomy | November 30, 2005 at 12:37 PM